Dear Momma G

I hope you like your letter name. I think it suits you well. I actually think you’d be an awesom parent,,, I have a feeling you’re great with kids. Like you’d be the cool one that’s always giving them candy and lowkey hinting that you still smoke weed even though you’re like this suburban mom or something like that. BUT IN A GOOD WAY lolol I’m not putting you into that category of housewife or something.

But oh goodness gracious girl, you’re a real MVP. You’re a hUGe supporter of this blog and I hella appreciate it. You’re actually first to read just about all of my stuff and always give me confidence that I’m doing well and that the pieces are good. Always so kind, makes me feel good and gives me the confidence to continue writing.

Trying to remember the first time we met is not very easy for me, but I do know that we’ve been in good graces ever since our sophomore year in Biology. When I wasn’t doing stupid shenanigans with you know who, I bet we were goofing around and making fun of some of the younglings in the class. Together in comedy and in arms has seen to be our relationship for the last three years, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I remember once you turned me around in our chemistry class, you had just the most distressed look on your face, and said “John, Maddie doesn’t know what space is… Help me…” So yeah like we’ve seen some hilariously stupid shit together even early on.

Thanks to your ex, who just loves my company even now, we became really close over the summer. I wouldn’t have NONE of y’all making out or canoodling in front of me, so I forced conversation, and it worked. I think that’s how we got to know each other better honestly, I made y’all talk to me and your friend and made sure we all stayed on task lol. Whenever we hung out in a hazey corner of an open and beautiful park, I always thought that it was similar to a stereotypical teenager summer movie. And in the best possible way.

Ya know because you’re so invested in my blog now, and because I often come to you to check over my work, I feel like I’m almost using you sometimes. Like I feel bad asking you to do it, because there isn’t this exactly similar exchange of you wanting me to check over your writing ya know? But I recognize that that is not how it really is, because we actually have a pretty solid friendship going that doesn’t demand something like that. We’ve had a pretty consistent snapstreak for a while, even when it broke for a day we picked right back up on that shit. Whenever you have some kind of question about boys or whatever we talk about it. And whenever we party we ALWAYS have a good time (at least for a majority of the time lol). Even when I came up to you the first time, a FAR too drunk girl hit on me, we got drenched by the rain, and your friend was being fucking weird and petty,,, I still had a good time! Or even when we were fucking buttery as all hell and we walked for a solid 4 miles across campus,, and I (for some ungodly reason that I will never do again) left you in a Woodland Glenn waiting room,,, I still had a good time. Or even on your birthday, when I accidentally slipped something that I totally shouldn’t have in front of you and the boyfriend,, and y’all went and got yourselves lost for like almost the entire night, I (for the least) still had a good time.

Ya know now that I think about it, we’ve had our fair share of unfortunate shit happening whenever we decide to party… But hey, just remember our bowling trip. Or any of the other times I came up to visit you. Genuinely some of the best fun, best chill vibes, and best conversations, with some of the best people. I’m super glad that we’re close now, I feel that we’re just really good partners in crime for whatever we want to do. We will continue this, and you will somehow get me a chance with a girl, maybe Bambi, or our goddess friend whom I “shamelessly” (as you said lol) rewatched a tasteful snapchat from our bowling night.

Maybe I just need to come up and show off my “legendary hipster status” to all your sorority girlies and I’ll be set.

Love ya dude.

Your Partner In Crime,        John Burke



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